The Inn LW12
Canadian/Pub
7 Ninth Avenue at Little W. 12th
NY, NY 10014
(212) 206 0300
A, C, E to 14th Street
This place is as pretentious as its messed-up name. Billed as the alternative to the Spotted Pig or the “other” gastropub, my friend and I thought we’d try it for dinner. We made a reservation for 8:30pm. Just so you know, reservations are a joke – we sat there amongst empty tables for our entire meal on the second floor. Obviously, there are smarter foodies than me out there.
We started with The Inn LW12’s own version of the ever-so-popular ginger-flavored cocktail. Despite decent flavor, the drinks were horrifically small. For our meal, we started with egg cocotte and the Inn salad. The cocotte was quite good – rich, tasty, and a small enough size to not overwhelm. My friend looked at me midway through and said, “This is delicious, but I should probably stop. I don’t want to ruin my appetite.”
Here’s my theory and I’m sure I’m not solo on this one. If something’s good, eat it. Everything to follow could get much worse. Cue in suspenseful music.
I worked on the Inn salad, which our waiter promised was delicious and one of their “signature” starters. Rule #1: Don’t believe anything the waiter recommends. The salad was a sad version of something I make at home when there’s nothing in the fridge, right down to the piece of toast with olive tapenade spread – completely unoriginal. If that was the “signature” dish, I was seriously shuddering in fear of what was to come. Rule #2: The waiter might just be telling the truth, but you kind of have to read between the lines.
For our mains, I ordered the grilled lamb burger with chickpea fries. My friend ordered the seared striped bass which had, on that day, been replaced with dorade. To be honest, the dorade smelled and tasted quite fishy. To our good fortune, we had to stop eating the dorade because it actually swam off the plate and jumped back into the East River. As a result of the absence of one of our main dishes, the lamb burger received much more attention. Unfortunately, though, it wasn’t even very a) inventive (besides the chickpea fries which, for the record, are not nearly as yummy as good ol’ potato fries) or b) tasty.
On the side, we ordered one of the famous poutines. Our choice was the poutine with tomato and cheese curds. As our waiter explained, poutines are like street food in Canada. From the sounds of it, I knew I’d like it. Sure, I’ve never had street food while in Canada but c’mon, who doesn’t like street food? New York City, sadly, probably has the worst street food in the world (compared to other metropolises or metropoli, however it may be referred to). Perhaps Bangkok has the best street food I’ve tried thus far. Seoul is a close second, if so.
The poutine was a cast iron plate of French fries covered in tomato sauce and cheese. It was good, sure, but just as good as the kind of munchie food you ordered at 3 am at the diner in college. I actually used to eat something just like this in high school at the Mamaroneck Diner. Disco fries, which meant crispy French fries with melted mozzarella cheese atop and a side of tomato sauce. Yeah, that was in Mamaroneck, New York. A bit of a way from Canada. And not $12, more like $5.
The classiest part of our meal following the smelly fish that went home to the East River was the service. At one point during our meal, the busboy knocked over a large bottle of sparkling water which subsequently knocked over our two, half-empty cocktails. My friend and I were literally drenched and rather than offer us clean napkins to dry ourselves, the busboy wiped off the table with the napkins off the tables adjacent to ours. Since we were the only diners on the floor, the waiter ran over to us, as well as someone who appeared to be an owner. There were brief apologies and comments such as, “well thank God it was sparkling water,” upon seeing me wiping off my silk dress. Somehow, there wasn’t any mention of a complimentary beverage to replace the two that had been knocked over or even a complimentary bottle of water.
By the end of our meal, we were pretty frustrated and kind of hungry, too. We ordered the sticky toffee pudding because New York Magazine recommended it, as did our waiter. We obviously need to learn how to learn a lesson.
The pudding was exactly what we expected and not a drop beyond. During dessert, my friend’s tea cup, full of tea, was even knocked over. Fortunately, it spilled outward and not towards us. When my companion asked for artificial sweetener, the waiter responded that the restaurant did not carry any artificial sweeteners but that he’d “look around.” Less than 5 seconds later, a packet of Equal materialized. For not carrying artificial sweeteners, the brevity in which the “sugar” packet was delivered was even faster than restaurants which boast an impressive selection of Equal, Sweet n Low, and Splenda.
When we got the check, surely we were surprised that we were charged for every drink we had ordered (including the ones that had spilled) and even the sparkling water. We would have complained but we refused to stay at The Inn LW12 for even a second longer. We could sense our luck was about to run out.